The Son of A Famous Apologist Doubts His Faith: My Story
I grew up as the son of an influential apologist, Josh McDowell. Even though my parents taught me how to understand my faith, live it, and defend it, I found myself having serious doubts as a college student in the mid 90s. What was that like? How did my parents respond? Here’s the story.
READ: How Do You Best Respond When Kids Question Their Faith? (https://seanmcdowell.org/blog/when-kids-question-their-faith)
READ: Evidence that Demands A Verdict (https://amzn.to/32n7seL)
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I always say that the biggest catalyst of me getting serious about investigating the Christian faith I was raised in, was a smarty pants atheist friend I had at 17 or 18. This was in the mid '70, and my friend was the first person I knew that had seriously thought about being an atheist and why he was. I came to Christ (or at least I think I did) as a child. But I wasn't old enough for it to have been a knowing submitted / committed faith. All I know is, for a period, I flirted with atheism – due to the doubts my friend had sown within me. And at first I thought – wow, no God, no moral constraints – I can do whatever I want – and so I thought I was free. But I quickly realized I was anything but free – and for about a year things became dark, depressing, fearful. And then I had an experience that "turned the lights back on" to my faith. Or maybe, I discovered faith in Christ for the very first time? What I do know is my friend had me thinking deeply about issues related to God, when most of my friends could have cared less (mothers, be careful who you allow your kids to hang around with, eh? LOL.
I feel like this I have never been to the "world" but I realized how sinful I was and how much I doubted the Bible and God. I am stil growing in faith but have faced many doubts in my life.
For all the good Josh and his son have done in defending the truth of the Bible, and the gospel, I am shocked that no one has pointed out the fatal flaw of Josh's original book: "Evidence that demand's a verdict." Namely, his defense of the deity of Jesus. For in his book he jumps to the false conclusion that because Jesus unequivocally declared himself the Son of God, that meant he was saying he was God. That was the mistake the Jews of his day made. The spirit of God was in Jesus to the fullest reconciling the world to Himself. But Jesus himself was not Yahweh. He was the son of Yahweh. As all believers in Jesus now are. And that doesn't make us God!
I think the biggest evidence for my faith ironically is the study of the near-death experience. I wrote a book paralling the Bible and the Near-Death Experience.
I'm so impressed by father and son. As a freshman in college in 1980, the books and cassette tapes of Josh were pivotal in my turning from skepticism to faith. But as Sean said, it was understanding my need for a Savior that was the real turning point. All these years later, I wish I had had the maturity to respond to my own children's doubts as Josh did to Sean. It's a big regret, and the story is not over. But I'm so grateful for them both.
Thank you Sean. Your testimony is helpful to me. I subscribed to your channel last week.
3:40 To all Mormons doubting the LDS faith: don’t walk away unless you’re persuaded that it’s really not true.
Thanks for doing this. Nice to hear a bit of his story. His show is great, lots of thoughtful questions and terrific guests. He is a great interviewer, but he is one of the best preachers I have ever heard. Nice to hear some of his background story. And if you ever get a chance to hear this guy preach do yourself a favor and tune in.
A year or maybe 2 ago your reputation among your critics was that you were one of the more intellectually honest christian apologists active. But more recently you have fallen in with the DI, ICR, and AiG crew and are losing that credibility.
Fabulous? How can you not admit you’re a racist and nazi apologist?
It's a great story that is connectable regardless of belief.
The end is near?
The Bible’s New Testament contains a drumbeat of promises that Jesus is ready to return any day now, implying that it will happen so soon that it would be wise to keep it in mind when making any kind of life decision. But it didn’t happen. The following is a sample of verses professing this theme:
Matt 10:23: [Jesus said to his disciples] ‘When they persecute you in one town, flee to the next; **for truly, I say to you, you will not have gone through all the towns of Israel, before the Son of man comes’.** (They fled through the towns but the Son of Man never came)
Matt 16:28: [Jesus said to the disciples], ‘Truly, I say to you, there are some standing here who will not taste death before they see the Son of man coming in his kingdom’.
Mark 9:1: And he [Jesus] said to them [the disciples], ‘Truly, I say to you, there are some standing here who will not taste death before they see that the kingdom of God has come with power’.
Mark 13:30: [After detailing events up to end of world, Jesus says] ‘Truly, I say to you, **this generation will not pass away before all these things take place’.**
Mark 14:62: And Jesus said **[to the high priest – died 1st cent. AD]** ‘You will see the Son of man seated at the right hand of Power, and coming with the clouds of heaven’. (The high priest died and never saw the Son of Man)
Rom 13:12: The day is at hand.
1 Cor 7:29: The appointed time has grown very short; from now on, let those who have wives live as though they had none. (Funny thing to say if you didn’t think the end was imminent)
1 Cor 7:31: For the form of this world is passing away.
Phil 4:5: The Lord is coming soon.
1 Thess 4:15: We who are alive, who are left until the coming of the Lord.
Hebrews 1:2: In these last days he has spoken to us by a Son.
Hebrews 10:37: For yet a little while, and the coming one shall come and shall not tarry.
James 5:8: The coming of the Lord is at hand.
1 Peter 1:20: He [Christ] was destined before the foundation of the world but was made manifest at the end of the times.
1 Peter 4:7: The end of all things is at hand.
1 John 2:18: It is the last hour; and as you have heard that antichrist is coming.
Rev 1:1: The revelation of Jesus Christ (i.e., the end of the world)…to show to his servants what must soon take place.
Rev 3:11: [Jesus said] ‘I am coming soon’.
Rev 22:6: And the Lord…has sent his angel to show his servants what must soon take place.
Rev 22:20: [Jesus said] ‘Surely I am coming soon’.
It is puzzling to understand why Christianity survived the failure of this prediction. It is not ambiguous. This would be like a rich uncle who promises to give you $10,000 ‘very soon.’ Ten years pass and he still hasn’t given anything to you, but he still says he will do it very soon. Would you still believe that it will happen any day? No, you would realize that it is a false promise. For some reason, Christians cannot comprehend that they have been scammed. Jesus is not coming back, not tomorrow, not next year, not ever. But they still think it will happen any day.
http://www.kyroot.com/
Watch Jesus: Apocalyptic Prophet, Historical Lecture – Bart D. Ehrman on YouTube
Google "13x Jesus was wrong in the Bible – Life Lessons"
Google "End Times – Evil Bible .com"
Google "The End of All Things is At Hand – The Church Of Truth"
Google "Resurrection – Fact or Myth – Omission Report"
Google "What’s Missing from Codex Sinaiticus, the Oldest New Testament? – Biblical Archaeology Society"
Google "The “Strange” Ending of the Gospel of Mark and Why It Makes All the Difference – Biblical Archaeology Society"
Google "ex-apologist: On One of the Main Reasons Why I Think Christianity is False (Reposted)"
Google "Why Jesus? Nontract (August 1999) – Freedom From Religion Foundation"
Google "272: JESUS’S 5200 AUTHENTIC WORDS – zingcreed"
Google "Jesus Predicted a First Century Return Which Did Not Occur – by Alex Beyman – Medium"
Google "Jesus’ Failed Prophecy About His Return – Black Nonbelievers, Inc."
"When we say…Jesus Christ…was produced without sexual union, and was crucified and died, and rose again, and ascended to heaven, **we propound nothing new or different** from what you believe regarding those whom you call Sons of God. [In fact]…if anybody objects that [Jesus] was crucified, this is in **common** with the sons of Zeus (as you call them) who suffered, as previously listed [he listed Dionysus, Hercules, and Asclepius]. Since their fatal sufferings are all narrated as not similar but different, so his unique passion should not seem to be any worse."
Note how Justin (Martyr) is less of a fool than modern Christian apologists. He admits that differences don’t matter. Since each and every one of the suffering and dying gods are slain by different means, one cannot argue the mytheme requires exactly the same means of death. “But Osiris can’t have inspired the Jesus myth because Osiris wasn’t nailed to a cross” is a stupid argument. The mytheme is simply death. Being killed. Suffering and dying. The exact mode of death can vary freely. It makes no difference to the existence and influence of the mytheme. It’s simply the particular instantiation of a generic abstraction. And Justin’s argument (that Satan invented these fake religions to confuse people) entails Justin agreed the mytheme existed: indeed, it was demonically promulgated, multiple times. Intentionally.
Likewise, Justin notices the mytheme is not virgin birth, but sexless conception. Of which many examples had already been popularized in pagan mythology (there just happens to also have been examples of actual virgin born gods as well). And by his argument (that the Devil was deliberately emulating the Jesus mytheme, in advance), Justin clearly accepted the same principle for “rising again” after death: the particular exact metaphysics of the resurrection could, like the exact method of death or conception, vary freely. The mytheme consists solely of the abstraction: returning to life. Somehow. Some way. We will say bodily, at the very least. But what sort of body (the same one, a new one, a mortal one, an immortal one), didn’t matter. If it had, Justin would have made the argument that “those gods” weren’t really resurrected. But that argument, never occurs to him. Nor did it to any other apologist of the first three centuries.
Ancient Christians well knew there was nothing new about their dying-and-rising god. Not in respect to the mytheme. Their claims were solely that his particular instantiation of it was better, and the only one that actually happened. They didn’t make up the stupid modern arguments that dying-and-rising god myths didn’t exist or weren’t part of a common mytheme everyone knew about. For example, in the same century, Tertullian, in Prescription against Heretics 40, makes exactly the same argument as Justin. Funny that. They had better access to the evidence than we do. They knew what was really and widely the case. We should listen to them.
Google "Dying-and-Rising Gods: It's Pagan, Guys. Get Over It. • Richard Carrier"
Google "Ehrman Errs: Yes, Bart, There Were Dying & Rising Gods – atheologica"
Watch "Dying & Rising Gods: A Response to William Lane Craig" by Derreck Bennett at Atheologica.
Google "Virgin Birth: It's Pagan, Guys. Get Over It. • Richard Carrier"
Google "5 Pagan Parallels to Jesus That Actually Aren’t Bullshit – Atheomedy"
Google "Christian Apologetics: The Art of Deceit – Atheomedy"
Google "Defending the Resurrection: It’s Easy if You Lie! – Atheomedy"
Google "Majority of Scholars agree: The Gospels were not written by Eyewitnesses – Escaping Christian Fundamentalism"
A good site written by an actual Biblical scholar.
Google "Contradictions in the Bible | Identified verse by verse and explained using the most up-to-date scholarly information about the Bible, its texts, and the men who wrote them — by Dr. Steven DiMattei"
Google "How do we know that the biblical writers were **not** writing history? — by Dr Steven DiMattei"
Also:
Google "How Did The Gospel Writers Know? – The Doston Jones Blog"
Google "Yes, the Four Gospels Were Originally Anonymous: Part 1 – The Doston Jones Blog"
Wow this was so good. Just really spoke to me. Thank you for your story and just so helpful to me. I'm grateful for this. Especially when you said "I'm the older brother who has stayed, done the work, been doing good, but I'm just as lost and I need grace even more because I think I don't need it." Wow so brilliantly worded.
"The sheer existence of apologists is reason alone to raise suspicion. Their dishonesty is blatant when you simply double check what they say. In the end, historians and scientists are not just one big conspiracy against Jesus, the Bible is simply wrong about most things."
—Joseph R. Hanson
Oh my worrrd JOSH MCDOWELL IS HIS DAD! I KNEW there was a reason I liked this channel! Why did it take this long to figure that out??
And that book just happened to be published on my birthday 10/3 😄
Your father's response was/is amazing. Just really resonated with me and with what I'm dealing with my teenage boys. Thank you so much.
Great t-shirt!
I'm a cradle Catholic but I just have so many questions about God in general mostly CONCERNING Hell. How is a FINITE lifetime of SIN deserves ETERNAL TORTURE and TORMENT in Hell. All the SUFFERINGS on this Earth is just a TINY PERCENT compared to the SUFFERINGS you and I will get to EXPERIENCE in Hell. So I NEED and I MUST believe in the Lord Jesus Christ or I will BURN in Hell for all ETERNITY.
Those “old gods” were actually real. But Christianity is still true, and explains exactly who they were in Genesis 6. God is called the most high for a reason. There ARE other divine beings. But he’s the only one that is species unique as Dr. Michael Heiser puts it. Only one actual God. And then the fallen angels that wanted to be God themselves and create their own families. Satan was just the first Rebel. All he did was guarantee us death through Adam and Eve, but the fallen angels of Genesis 6, the watchers in Enoch, are the reason for human depravity. They are the reason for the flood, not just “human evil” , it was about erasing the abominations created by those fallen angels. I mean that’s why the promised land later became the promised land, that’s what the conquest was about. Wiping out the last remaining nephilim descendants’ clans (the giants, as in the Amorites etc.) God turned the land of his enemies into his throne. It’s poetic justice.
Thank you so much for this Dr. Sean, I thank God for your channel and your ministry, ps: and I do identify with the older son, too.
You are all following a 66 book bible believing only the new testament is relevant and for today. Yet our Messiah came to put all things back on track for even the Rabbis had overridden the Torah with their Talmud. So now you cingle to a book not only modified by the Rabbis but heavily altered by many Popes, kings, and even a drunk monk. Not even realizing there are some 45 books missing and you fear them or disregard them because a Pope tells you to. If you should at least look into the Hebrew words instead of the Greek you would see in Our Messiahs own words He came to "UPHOLD" the law not complete it and thereby nullify it. The only law our Messiah conquered was the law of sin and death, not all the laws.
“I’ve raised you above all to seek and follow truth.” It seems, in this context, that father McDowell was implying a possibility that seeking truth could mean something other than seeking God. But from a Christian worldview, what else does “seek and follow truth” mean if not to seek and follow God? There is no truth apart from God. In Christ “are hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge” (Col. 2:3). If father McDowell raised son McDowell above all to seek and follow truth, but that means something other than raising him above all to seek and follow God, isn’t that a non-Christian worldview? Or even idolatry (putting “truth” above God – as if this were possible)?